Slutiness for men.

I don’t like the term ‘slut’ either because it is used at the wrong times, and insults are not my cup of tea anyway, too aggressive. Because the word ‘slut’ is too harsh, I am going to replace it with the word ‘sloot’ because it is more light-hearted… what do you think? I can’t hear you. I’ll assume you approve…

Anyway, let’s talk about sloots. You shouldn’t call a girl a sloot for liking sex… you should know that by now but I am hammering it in for you anyway. What you may think is quite slooty behaviour though (still shouldn’t ever call a girl a sloot) is when a girl gets with a lot of guys to feel better about herself. Let’s say she has a low self esteem and is seeking the validation of being attractive by seeing if guys will get with her. She feels bad most of the day, goes out, pulls, feels better a little bit… the guy she got with doesn’t want anything serious, so she feels bad about herself the next day, rinses and repeats. There are other reasons girls become promiscuous… maybe they try to live up to their reputation of being a sloot? Maybe they went to an all girl’s school and now, at uni, are compensating for the lack of cockadoodle doo in her teenage years. In any case, getting down and dirty with people to boost your ego is looked down upon in society if you are a girl. We should just be more understanding, and explain they don’t need to do this instead of labeling them but that is not the point of this post and I am rambling again… sozzles.

What I wanted to say in this post is that men can be sloots too. If you are flying around like a butterfly, trying to suck the nectar from every flower in order to approve your identity, then you will not be respected for being a ‘player’. Being a player is about juggling girls in relationships. This is not cool either, but it is for some reason seen as a good thing with the ‘lads’. Girls don’t actually want a player, if you happen to believe in that misconception. What is respectable is just being the kind of guy that a lot of girls like being with. Players just have the confidence, the juggling is not seen as attractive by most women.

Other ways guys can be a sloot is if they are trying to simply rack up their score and ‘close’. It makes them feel better about themselves and they also think it makes them look cool in front of their friends who actually don’t care about it. Girls don’t want to be treated as a level in a video game. It’s  quite dehumanising to only see women as a potential mark on the bedpost. Girls want a relationship where they are treated as another human being, not a fleshlight.

Some guys love to identify as a player or even a PUA. They think this identity is cool. It’s who they are/who they want to be. Lot’s of people act in a certain way to equip or fulfill their identity. Goths wear the colour black. Posh people wear pretentious clothing. News presenters all speak in the same way. Players and PUAs approach girls to show to themselves and others that they can get with women. They think it is cool, and will use facial expressions taken from ‘alpha male’ characters in cheesy films to show how cool they think they are. It’s very cringe.

Desperation is the last main reason why guys are sloots. A guy who is desperate is willing to get with anyone that gives him the slightest bit of attention. I am bored of explaining why being desperate is bad. Just… try and create some standards for yourself. Imagine the type of personality that would be able to stand the test of time with you. If you think a girl’s personality is so bad that their is no point even giving her a moment of your time, give her a fake excuse and move on.

The actual number of people that someone has slept with does not really say much about people unless it is in the 100’s or if it is zero. So stop judging yourself and others.

Have fun x

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