Dealing with so-called ‘obstacles’

If something unexpected pops up during one of your interactions with a girl, you might see these unforeseen events as ‘obstacles’ to overcome, this will psych you out and you will ruin your chances.  Relax. In the PUA community, it is told that guys (referred to as ‘AMOGS’ in that book) that interfere with your interactions with girls are ‘cock blocks’. These so-called cock-blocks are apparently always trying to stop you from moving forwards with girls. They allegedly are jealous and want to protect the girl from you so that they will have a chance instead.  Guys that are actually attempting to put you down in front of a girl are try hards… as long as you just chill out, most of the time, the girl will think that they are pathetic, and you will not be in the difficult situation that you foresaw. It is also incredibly obvious that they are bitter and most girls can pick up on this so don’t worry about them stealing her from you.

If you do come across a guy who is trying hard to ‘out-do’ you, if you do not retaliate back and just take his hits, most of the time the girl will tell that you are more comfortable with yourself than him. If you are feeling mean, you could also put him on the spot by asking ‘why are you trying so hard, man?’ this will make him feel awkward and want to run away. You don’t have to do this, but if he is starting to get on your nerves then don’t feel bad… hopefully he will learn his lesson.

If you try to do this so-called cock blocking yourself,  the fact that you are overcompensating to stop a guy from ‘taking your girl’ will be communicated and the girl will think that you are trying so hard because having a girl in your life must be a rare situation for you… which it probably is… but… you can’t let her know! Advertising, right?

Anyway, let me just mention that a lot of guys don’t have the intention to cock block. This means that you should always be friendly and not a dick as soon as a guy comes in or you will seem too defensive, which is again, overcompensating, and you will have written ‘I am scared that this guy is better than me’ across your forehead.  If the girl sees you are relaxed around other guys, she won’t see any red flags about you behaving weirdly around her guy friends if you were to end up in a relationship. Good stuff.

Another one of the biggest so-called ‘obstacles’ is when the friends of the girl you are trying to… *ahem* charm,  pop up and/or try to drag her away from you. What I liked to do is jokingly fight for the right to talk to her. I would say stuff like ‘Wait, she is my cousin!’ or ‘I was about to give her lots of money!’. Stop seeing it as a serious situation. You are not going to die if you lose her. Additionally, it is best to just reassure her friends that everything is ok. Introduce yourself to her friends or tell the girl to introduce you. Show that you are friendly (with a smile) and tell them you are a nice person. Most of the time, if you gave off a good impression to the target (just kidding), she will tell her friends you are cool.

Sometimes, her friends will not give you the benefit of the doubt and the girl you were talking to will walk away from you without standing up for you. You lost her. Who cares? Shrug it off and go find someone else to talk to. You don’t have to do what the leading PUAs tell you to do and ‘force laughter’ to cover up the pain. There is no need to pretend that what just happened was a good thing.

[Side note: doing that is also an obvious overcompensation to hide the fact that you actually care]

If she cared that much about what her friends thought of her being with you, then sorry to break it to you, but nothing serious was going to happen in the first place.

This is getting long. To weigh everything up, always try to stay calm, if you show any sign that you are scared to lose her, then that shows that you care too much about getting her. In the girl’s prediction of your future relationship, you will be over-protective and she will predict feeling trapped and not free. Not good… your potential as a boyfriend is diminished.

It is hard to catch a butterfly, but if that butterfly does not know you are trying to capture it, it will see no reason not to remain in your presence x

 

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