This concept is fairly advanced. I will try to keep it basic as I do not want to fry your brains.
Your mood and your emotions stem from your thoughts. The more you focus on a particular thought, the more of that emotion you will feel. The same works vice versa, if you were to stop focusing on a particular thought, the emotions that are linked with that thought will fade from your system.
Let’s take sadness. One of the reasons why we would feel sad is if we lost something that meant a lot to us, like a pet passing away. If you were to focus on how your pet, that you loved so much, is now gone and you will never see them again, you will feel the loss. The more you focus on that sense of loss, the sadder you will become. Now if you want to be able to hack your brain into only feeling emotions whenever you want to, then keep reading. If you think this is too controversial and is destroying what makes us human, then stop here.
[Side note: I think sadness exists so that we learn to protect things that are meaningful to us]
You have the ability to suppress or express your emotions at will. It is surprisingly simple, it just takes brain power and a bit of training. With the example above, if you were to simply not think about how much your pet meant to you and how it is gone, you would simply not feel the emotion. This works for all emotions… They are linked to certain situations and exist to help us in some way or another. The problem is that they do not always help. They can be a complete burden.
If you were to get rejected ten times in a row, you, and most other guys, would focus on what had just happened and focus on how life is unfair on them and they would get frustrated. They would focus on how other guys have it easier and they would feel jealous and bitter. They would focus on how the girls were disrespecting them and this would make them angry. If they were to just accept what had happened, and just tell themselves ‘it was not meant to be, oh well, on to the next one’ then they could be a lot more efficient in taking productive action. I know how guys can be, a few rejections and then their emotions lock them up in a little hole of self pity for a week.
Your focus also drives your decisions. If you had a tough choice to make, for example, saving your mum or your girlfriend… If you focused more on how much you depend on your mum and how she is family and has dedicated her life to you and raised you then you are likely to save your mum. If you focused more on how your girlfriend appreciates you more than anyone else, is your best friend and soul mate and you have the rest of your lives to spend with eachother and raise a child, you are more likely to save your girlfriend. My point is that this can be controversially used into influencing other people’s decisions. How does this apply to getting a girlfriend? Well let’s say you are on a date, you really want to take things forward but she has just told you that she actually has a boyfriend but she is starting to not like him any more. Most guys would give up here. What you can do is make her focus on how it is unfair on her boyfriend for her to stay with him, how you and her clearly have so much chemistry, how you thought things were going somewhere, how much she meant to you. This is being the devil on someone’s shoulder. Please don’t use this for evil, the tools that can be used for good can also be used for bad, so I am relying on you to not persuade people to do bad things. Please.
Be good x