So, you have decided that you are going to be practical and get this social stuff sorted. You are at a house party or a club and build up the courage to go talk to that person you think is within your league. You walk over, say that line you repeated three times in your head and then… She looks at you, says ‘hi’ back (if you are lucky) and then inevitably ignores you – your worst nightmare.
But anyways, why did this happen?
Well, I’ll try and help you from the most basic of levels. Believe it or not, there was most likely a path where ‘you and her’ had potential. I mean, I am not saying you can be with any girl ever. But in case you did have a chance, here is a body language tool you may have heard of that makes a world of difference when it comes to first impressions.
Thing is, it holds much more power than you think – if used correctly.
Executing a genuine smile is somewhat of a skill; there is a whole world of smiles that ‘don’t work’ because they are not genuine smiles. Think about all those awkward photo moments where you forgot how to smile and you attempted to recreate it, but the end result was cringe-worthy.
There is a universally correct way of smiling. There are many guides on YouTube and such on how to do it.
What you will commonly hear is ‘it is all in the eyes’. This is half true. Half of it is about your eyes, half of it is about your mouth. With your eyes, you need to raise your bottom eye-lids slightly but not your top eyelids, it is not a squint. With your mouth, imagine you have some thread and you have got two strings on the either end of your lips where the top and bottom meet. Now like a puppeteer, imagine pulling those threads upwards.
This combination is the natural smile, and you can recreate it unnaturally, it just takes a lot of practice in the mirror. What helps, is imagining seeing your best friend after a month and how happy that makes you feel. Now through your amazing acting skills you have recently developed, let out that natural smile!
This little face mask is the key to coming across as friendly. Or in other words, not coming across as a threat.
If you imagine being in a girl’s situation, a complete stranger, potential rapist guy has just said ‘hi’ to you with a deadpan face.
“DANGER ALERT. POTENTIAL THREAT. ESCAPE SITUATION BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY.”
That is what happens in a girl’s mind. Don’t judge her, she is just trying to protect herself from yo creepy ass. That too by the way… Smiling is the key to not being creepy right off the get go.
If you show her that you do not present any threat, there should be less reason for her to want to escape the situation. Don’t ask me why this phenomenon is the case, it just is. Magic.
Good luck x